"One small step for man, One giant step toward unemployment."-Neil Armstrong

Okay. So maybe Neil Armstrong did not exactly articulate that exact quote. But half of it is correct and I'm looking at that as a glass half full situation. Sue me for utilizing comedic effect.

So here I am, a four day old graduate being thrust out into the real world of job searching (and by searching, I mean finding 20 postings, applying for 20 positions, and hearing nothing back), bills, and gaining two new roommates (fondly known as Kathie and Kevin Sheehan-my parents). Here is what I've learned thus far:
-I majored in a subject that did not prepare me at all to find a career. Great.
-I am most looking forward to buying a suit to wear on interviews. I want to get an old giant cellphone to use to complete my look of "Early 90s woman on the go"-- complete with black nylons and gymshoes, of course.
-I don't have Bravo or the Lifetime Movie Network in my cable package at home. This is a huge incentive to find a job.

My greatest fear at this point in time is pulling up to a job interview in my lovely 1998 Buick, Lenny. For anyone who has been in my car, it is a delight, as it is a sofa on wheels. However, it also tends to give outsiders the impression that I am either a.) in a gang or b.) a 95 year old woman. Obviously, either impression will inevitably hinder my obtaining gainful employment.

This begins my dilemma--where do I find an employer who wants to hire a saavy, sarcastic, slightly awkward, seasoned writer with a panache for the outlandish and outstanding?


Maybe we'll find out. Or maybe I'll be selling hot dogs in the local park by my house.