Life Lessons (that everyone neglected to tell me)

As I was walking to the train this afternoon (out of work an hour early, thank you very much), I started thinking about my skills. At every interview I've gone to, I've been asked "What are your strong suits? Your weaknesses?" And every time I give the same answer, "I have advanced writing skills, strong public speaking abilities...and my only weakness is that I may be too personable..."--and then I give a smile and everyone has a good chuckle because I'm such a ham.

Moral of the story: My answers are lame.

Of course I'm a great writer. I majored in English. If I was not a phenomenal writer by this point, well, we'd have something to worry about. Public speaking? Obviously. I've done 35 musicals. For heaven's sakes, I could do cartwheels* in a cat costume while singing the entire score of "The Music Man" without batting an eyelash.

(*Note--I can't do a cartwheel. I end up just rolling around on the ground in a somersault-seizure movement. It's a really bad scene.)

And as for my weakness answer? Forget it. One day a potential employer is going to hear that answer and either a.) look at me with sheer horror or b.) physically assault me. Either way, I will not be getting the job.

This got me thinking. I realized that there are quite a few things I have done in my life that no one ever told me would be completely useless. Here are my top 3:

1.) Flute lessons--The chances of me ever becoming a flutist were slim to none. On the upside, it taught me to read music. On the downside, the very thought of having to play quickly enough to keep up with the rest of the band scared to the point where I now actually fear rhythm...

2.) Irish Dancing--*sigh* Eleven years. ELEVEN YEARS I danced. And what did it get me? Nothing. Not only did it hinder my success in other forms of dance until I was 21 years old (and that's still debatable), but it has rendered me completely useless at making my arms appear graceful...which is especially unfortunate since my wingspan is longer than my actual height. Yes, that's right, I am a human albatross. How embarrassing.

LOOK AT MY ARMS. Palms flexed, elbows locked--If I got a good flapping motion going, there is a solid chance I could actually take flight. Thanks a lot, Irish stepdance.

3.) Drinking Diet Coke-- For as long as I can remember, we've always had diet pop in our house.This has led me to develop a severe addiction to Diet Coke, so severe that I actually have a friend who asked me, for the sake of our friendship, not to give it up.

Why, you may ask? Because I turn into the daughter of Satan. God forbid I get a job somewhere that does not have a pop machine or fountain pop establishment within a 3 mile radius because I will actually lose all control over my life.

All of my hobbies (and yes, with the way I consume Diet Coke it can be labeled a "hobby) have done nothing for me except give me crazy arms and a caffeine twitch. They also have absolutely no connection to marketing/public relations in the slightest.

But hey...who's to say there's not an employer out there who wouldn't love to have a potential employee play "Hot Cross Buns" (in the wrong key), bust out a jig, and chug a $1 Diet Coke from McDonalds in an interview.

Everyone's got their talents.